I'm a psych major, and this term we're supposed to do an internship, for ten weeks. I'v gotten my internship at a great place, and were due to start monday. Yesterday, the tutor emailed the course organiser and said that they couldn't take me, due to "a crisis at the workplace". Great. They fight and bicker and now I don't have anywhere to go come Monday. It sucks, actually. I'm pulling every string I've got, but it's not easy finding a new place with this short notice (it's not easy finding a new place at all).
That started our weekend off. Today we went to a funeral, an hours drive away. My owners uncle died about a month ago, he was my father-in-laws only remaining brother. My FIL is a closet alcholist, and reeked of booze today. My poor mistress was panicky and out of sorts. And an hour long drive with a very energetic 1,5-year old is trying at the best of times. Which this wasn't.
The ceremony was nice, the cake was good, there was a playroom for our daughter in the parish house, and she slept all the way home. But boy, am I tired now...
And tomorrov, Saturday, mistress have to work most of the day. She has an important meeting, she's gonna lead a conference for about 90 people during the day. Which she, of course, is really stressed out about.
This really isn't a very good weekend. Really really.
But tuck babygirl in for the night, and have a few hours by ourselves. I look forward to that! Beer, snacks, a movie and my wife - all good things. And if I'm good, maybe she'll spank me! (Though probably not. Stress is not good for our sex life.)
Feb 18, 2011
Feb 17, 2011
A beating and a new beginning
I didn´t feel like writing here for a long time. The last summer post was about sleeplessness, and that part only got worse during the fall. It got so bad it was like torture. Hard to describe, hard to live with, very hard to write anything or want to write anything. And very little to write about. The brain does funny things when you don't sleep.
In some miraculous way, we have stayed together. We still, or all over again, like eachother. Love eachother. I'm hers, she's my Owner, my Mistress. And we're beginning to get an idea about how our life will be, as a family, without absolutely everything focusing on sleep. Babygirl sleeps through the night nowadays, at least most of the time, and even though it took us awhile, we are beginning to resemble human beings again.
She beat me, this morning. I begged for it yesterday, but if it's one thing I've learned the last year it's not to have expectations. She'll do what she wants to when she wants to, and really, that's the only way that works. But I can beg, and I did, and she said something like "no, I'll wait 'til the baby is at daycare".
And it turned out that she really meant this morning, when I've gotten back home again after leaving the baby. I didn't really think she would do it, mostly because I didn't want to be disappointed. But of course she did. She almost always do what she says she will. And now she ordered me to lay down on the bed, handcuffed me and chained me to the bed, and beat me. At first with her leather belt, than with the whip. The belt missed it's mark a couple of times, and landed at my small back in a frightening, painful way that made me cry. She hugged me, but didn't stop, and somehow that felt so right. Exactly as it's supposed to be. This beating wasn't about my pleasure, even though I needed it and had begged for it. It was about her, wanting to beat me.
With the whip for awhile I got that floaty feeling, it felt good and I was in subspace. But then she changed to her cane, a big, thuddy, heavy cane, one of the few implements that gives me bruises. And I love how obvious it was what she was doing - she wanted to mark me, plain and simple. It wasn't about what I felt or thought, it was about making pretty stripes on my ass. It was hard, actually, to lie still like she wants me to, but it helped that I know she sees when I'm struggling. She knew it was hard, it was supposed to be. It didn't get any easier when she switched to the rattan. The rattan makes me bleed, eventually. She had to tell me to lie still and take it, and that helped.
Afterwards, she fucked me, still handcuffed to the bed. It's the coolest feeling. I'm not really horny, I don't feel like that. But I think I'm wet. And I'm just so grateful to belong to her, to be taken by her. It simply feels right.I just want to belong to her, always and all the time.
In some miraculous way, we have stayed together. We still, or all over again, like eachother. Love eachother. I'm hers, she's my Owner, my Mistress. And we're beginning to get an idea about how our life will be, as a family, without absolutely everything focusing on sleep. Babygirl sleeps through the night nowadays, at least most of the time, and even though it took us awhile, we are beginning to resemble human beings again.
She beat me, this morning. I begged for it yesterday, but if it's one thing I've learned the last year it's not to have expectations. She'll do what she wants to when she wants to, and really, that's the only way that works. But I can beg, and I did, and she said something like "no, I'll wait 'til the baby is at daycare".
And it turned out that she really meant this morning, when I've gotten back home again after leaving the baby. I didn't really think she would do it, mostly because I didn't want to be disappointed. But of course she did. She almost always do what she says she will. And now she ordered me to lay down on the bed, handcuffed me and chained me to the bed, and beat me. At first with her leather belt, than with the whip. The belt missed it's mark a couple of times, and landed at my small back in a frightening, painful way that made me cry. She hugged me, but didn't stop, and somehow that felt so right. Exactly as it's supposed to be. This beating wasn't about my pleasure, even though I needed it and had begged for it. It was about her, wanting to beat me.
With the whip for awhile I got that floaty feeling, it felt good and I was in subspace. But then she changed to her cane, a big, thuddy, heavy cane, one of the few implements that gives me bruises. And I love how obvious it was what she was doing - she wanted to mark me, plain and simple. It wasn't about what I felt or thought, it was about making pretty stripes on my ass. It was hard, actually, to lie still like she wants me to, but it helped that I know she sees when I'm struggling. She knew it was hard, it was supposed to be. It didn't get any easier when she switched to the rattan. The rattan makes me bleed, eventually. She had to tell me to lie still and take it, and that helped.
Afterwards, she fucked me, still handcuffed to the bed. It's the coolest feeling. I'm not really horny, I don't feel like that. But I think I'm wet. And I'm just so grateful to belong to her, to be taken by her. It simply feels right.I just want to belong to her, always and all the time.
Jul 16, 2010
Vacation
Vacation. That´s the thing. Glorious vacation. Eight days in a cabin by the sea, with my Owners parents. And, very important, with my Owners parents and our little babygirl in a different cabin than the one me and my Owner has been sleeping in. Eight nights of uninterrupted sleep. That in itself was heaven. And eight nights of falling asleep together, of sleeping the whole night together, and of waking up together without having spent the night apart. We needed that, badly.
If only babygirl could sleep at night, everything would be so much better. The sleeplessness ruins if not everything, then at least a whole lot. Everything is harder when nobody gets to sleep properly.
I love waking up with my Owner. I love going to sleep with her. And I love getting spanked, and fucked, and taken care of. It so so wonderful, and I've cried several times over how wonderful it is, and how I've missed it.
If only babygirl could sleep at night, everything would be so much better. The sleeplessness ruins if not everything, then at least a whole lot. Everything is harder when nobody gets to sleep properly.
I love waking up with my Owner. I love going to sleep with her. And I love getting spanked, and fucked, and taken care of. It so so wonderful, and I've cried several times over how wonderful it is, and how I've missed it.
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