"Knifes seems to suit you" min friend I. said in chat today. And she also said "write a blog post! I'm out of things to do besides studying." So I guess I'll comply.
Knife play does suit me. Or well us, since I think it suits Mistress very well.
She's taught me very well to be still and relax when she tortures me. In the beginning I used to trash around a lot more. Now, I usually get to that place where I lie perfectly still much more quickly. I know some enjoy watching their victim squirm, and I actually enjoy a good squirming now and then, but Mistress doesn't and that's that. She wants me still and isn't all that interested in my input, and so I'm still and quiet.
So going from tying me up and beating on me to tying me up and cutting in to me isn't all that big a leap. She gets so very concentrated I can feel it. I feel like a canvas she uses to make art, and that's a form of objectification I love. I can let go of myself and just be, exist, nothing demanded of me. It helps that so far she's tied me up very securely so I don't even have to put in the effort to keep myself still.
It hurts, of course, but it's a different kind of hurt than being spanked or whipped, and not necessarily worse. Many implements for beating seems to be constructed to do the least amount of damage with the most amount of pain and impact. A knife is a bit the other way around. There's a lot of damage being done, but it's precise deliberate damage, and it doesn't hurt as much.
The heart is still on my shoulder, all the scabs are gone but there's a faint red line where they were before. A beating with marks that lasts for two weeks? It would have been one hell of a session, and it would have taken hours. The knife is special because it is both much worse and much less when it comes to pain and impact than any of her other implements.
Also, the mere idea of having her over me with a frikking knife in her hand! There's impact right there, without her doing anything at all.
Knife play intrigues me. Master has not cut me, but sometimes he will run the knife across me, and just the fact of him holding a knife, the threat of cutting, makes me scared and excited.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if he ever will. He says it is too much like work, that he doesn't want to see my blood.
I think the blood is both a good thing and a bad thing for Mistress. She's not used to blood, and she said once that it made her feel faint. But I think she really likes to see her impact on my body. She's not into blood play though, which I appreciate because I'm a bit squeamish when it comes to things that are sploshy or squishy. I like being cut into - but I would hate having any kind of food sex, for example, or like mud wrestling.
ReplyDeleteIt's more the idea that she cuts me 'til I bleed that I think does it for us.